Six weeks in and counting, I like the rest of you have spent away from my work, my friends, my activities,
the mall and the Urban Diner, their Mac n cheese is to die for: and most regrettable my hairdresser.
My hair is an unfortunate disaster. This time out is less counting all my wrongdoings in the naughty
chair and more stay home and stay there. During this worldwide lockdown, I have spent this time with
my children and my fiancé. Is it easy every minute of every day? No. Is it unbelievably a gift
ABSOLUTELY. I choose and most importantly allow myself to be grateful for this time.
As a working mother and I do not believe I am alone in these thoughts, I find necessary the time I choose to have
away providing for my family and the time that I am able to return to them tired, refreshed and happy. I
absolutely find sacred that the daily snuggle with my baby, my Beau. In the quiet of our room he chats
with me …his gibberish is a conversation that him and I have. The way Paulo and I can divide and
conquer the household chores needed to restore function in our home and the ones my 13-year-old
fights. I have been able to connect with my oldest son and find common ground as for him, I am too old,
and he may feel like I think he’s too young to understand.
I think there is a difference between being lonely and loneliness. Do I feel loneliness yes, am I lonely?
No. I have a full enough life to be able to reflect on what I have and at times what I do not. My family is
healthy. Beau is getting bigger every day and my Cohen, his freckles multiplying. Do I miss the freedom
of being able to walk into a store without measuring the distance between myself and the person beside
me_ absolutely? For now, I must accept that this is life, for the time being.
There are so many people who are forced to be separated from their loved ones by work obligations or
health reasons. I myself, have friends who work on the front lines of the hospital, or the walk’in clinic
and the grocery store are and have family members at home who are immunocompromised. My love,
admiration and prayers go out to these people who are forced to miss these moments with
consequences far greater than I can even imagine.
I am grateful that my job has chosen to tell me to be home that my value there is nonetheless intact I
am needed at home with my crew. My ability to live a ºnormal life maybe stunted for the time being,
my capacity for grateful and preserving this time remains stronger than ever.